Ms. Stress

26Jan10

On the train flashing back to what just happened

A lot of the time my mind was absent

But this time I’m sure on something

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I didn’t tell him though

Didn’t think I needed to

Thought goodbye…

Explained it all

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Now, I’m thinking…

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If I was to tell him directly

what would I have said…

Vex I didn’t say it then…

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I don’t miss the guy in front of me

I miss the guy you used to be

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I’m holding you, squeezing you tight

Wondering if you can feel

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I can feel you but you’re not here man!

There’s no connection here!

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I’m looking into this man’s eyes trying to find the door,

I’m knocking but no one wants to answer…

Like, is this really us?

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And yeah,

I know the house inside and out

Though I’m in front of this house and I know its appearance,

there’s something that’s not the same.

I don’t feel any connection

This is strange.

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I’m looking at this man and I’m hoping he can see the want in my eyes

(stamps feet)

Come on!

It’s me!

I don’t think he can see…this is not the response I wanted

He used to get excited when he saw me

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Now he’s so blasé about me

I’m feeling so uneasy

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Playing house isn’t fun anymore!

I’m tearing up inside

I don’t want to undo me and you

I’m going out of my mind!

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You’re making me insecure and ashamed.

The lights are on but I really wish they were off right now

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I’m not supposed to be here…

I need to give the keys back

They don’t belong to me

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You and I are no longer what we used to be

Could it be?

Have I gotten over you

You used to belong to me

And I belonged to you

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I thought she took him from me

She never had him at all…

——————————————

(Surely, I’m meant to feel jealous but I didn’t at all

Is that a sign that your love doesn’t live here anymore?)

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I’m looking into this man’s eyes and for the first time!

I’m walking out the door

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Never.

Coming.

Back.

No more.

Look out for the follow up ‘On My Own’…

Filed under: The Final Chapter Series   |  4 Comments